I love Forever 15′s fans SO MUCH. The emails and FB comments I get every time I post a daily word count (right now I’m writing a minimum of 1000 words a day on the Forever Fifteen sequel) put light into my life and a spring into my step.

I haven’t seen the latest Twilight movie, Breaking Dawn, yet, though I’ve heard all sorts of things (euphemism). I couldn’t help my urge to break down and write 15 Reasons Why Forever Fifteen is Better Than Twilight.

My friend, Nathanielle Sean Crawford, responded my post with this hilarious sendup comparing Forever Fifteen to the Twilight series.

Nathanielle Sean Crawford: Now for my 15 reasons why Lucy is a better protaganist than Bella and Edward combined.

1: Though Lucy (pre-John) would love to have found someone she could trust and love, she didn’t waste half her life pining for him.

2: Lucy genuinely cares for the people she encounters and actually feels bad about having to leave them when her vampiric life catches up with her.

3: Lucy started out in a position of submission with little freewill of her own and became an independant woman who made her own decisions and built up a circle of people who cared about her. Bella started out with parents that pined for her and friends that bent over backwards to include her in their group and was willing to chuck it all for a guy that tells her who she can hang out with and when, oh and destroyed her truck because it wasn’t safe for her.

4: Lucy encountered a child molester and tortured him to death. Bella’s friends with a guy who “fell in love” with her baby.

5: Edward apprently rules the school because of his “reputation” and Lucy has to deal with detention.

6: Lucy fed on murderers. Edward admitted to murder. (So did Rosalie, but considering what they did to her I give her a pass)

7: When a friend of Lucy tried to blackmail her into turning her, Lucy appealed to her common sense…by bashing her brain in. Edward allowed Bella to cow her into turning her.

8: Lucy has actually lived on her own for a time. But when she lives with people she earns her keep. Edward has lived with his “parents” for a hundred years and has no visible means of income.

9: When someone threatens Lucy’s family, she deals with them one on one. Edward’s idea of protecting Bella is to leave her alone with a bow on her head before fedexing her to his enemies.

10: Lucy doesn’t pretend to have the bean on every modern aspect of humanity. She just does her best and sometimes it turns out all right. Edward has an opinion about music past the fifties, more or less because of all that free time dicking around in Algebra class gives him.

11: Lucy saw the Black Plague and lived to tell about it. Edward got so sick from Spanish Influenza that he didn’t know which side of the bed to piss on.

12: Bella cooks because she thinks her dad is incompetent. Lucy cooks because she recognizes that her foster mother and father respectively work all day.

13: Bella gives her dad grief when he expects her to be responsible and communicate with him over where she is and when. Lucy apologizes to her foster father for being late.

14: When Bella has the heart of a guy who is younger than her, she manipulates him into doing crap for her while her real boyfriend is off doing god knows what. Lucy recognizes her foster brother’s infatuation and only loves him for the fact that he’s her foster brother, not a means to an end.

15: Kimberly Steele draws inspiration from the real world and all the realistic pain it can bring. Stephanie Meyers based an entire series around one little dream of meadows and rainbow farting deer.